What Are Your Doubts?

Looking at your shadow as a form of communication can be a big undertaking. Especially when we’re not even sure what that even means. So we’re going to explore how to bring compassion, acceptance, and love to what we dislike about ourselves. Also, we’ll validate our shadow triggers and bring awareness to the opportunity doubt brings us. This is a big episode, my friend. So buckle in and get ready for the liberating ride.◗

◤ Side Note: I was beyond pumped to talk about our shadow and dive into the dark, which I wouldn’t say is your normal response to a space in which we have a hard time facing. But I knew that taking the time to address our shadows in such a capacity would bring us more light into our experience, which is where my real excitement was anchored from. ▸

BRITTANY MARIE, YOUR HOST

This inner critic stuff? – It’s a part of our shadow, and it’s a part of our communication, and it’s a part of the way that we try to protect ourselves. And that’s something that we want to embrace. Not in the sense of, let me listen to that and really feel like the imposter, or dive into the traps of comparison, or feel unworthy. No, but it allows us to really face what’s at the root, right? Like, what’s holding us back? What’s not allowing me to engage in my truth – in my alignment? And what really makes me feel like me? Because that is the alignment. What really makes you feel like you – your truest version of you. So, embracing both sides is pivotal.

BENEFITS OF EXPLORING YOUR SHADOW

  • liberation from limiting beliefs
  • deeper connection to intuition
  • awareness of our alignment
  • development of healthy boundaries
  • compassion of poor or undesired habits or behaviors
  • understanding of self and clarity of self
  • feels like a weight of your shoulders
  • healing and releasing what no longer serves you

PREVIOUS EPISODES TO LISTEN TO

Meeting Your Spirit Guides, with Liza Fenster

Reading the Akashic Records, with Michelle Pellizzon

Exploring Your Spirituality, with Hannah Exner and Emily Wittenhagen

Witchcraft, Demystified, with Mallory Leone

Who Do You Fear Becoming?

Is Your Higher Self Playing Small?

SHADOW WORK

In case I haven’t made it clear enough before, diving into the shadow is the action of shadow work. Finding comfort, awareness, or compassion in you shadow – that’s all shadow work. And you can move about it in two different ways – as I have been able to determine. Either you can work through intense periods throughout your life, or you can make it a more gentle and eased practice you follow on a regular basis.

If you’re good at guessing, I’m sure it’s obvious that I’m a fan of route #2. But honestly, either way is great. One requires cocooning and a box of tissues, and the other needs a sense of flow and a box of tissues. Whichever way you decide to move, harnessing your breath will absolutely be key in becoming comfortable in the uncomfortable.

In the episode, I use Three Moon Collective‘s definition of Shadow Work as a main point of reference. When talking or engaging with others about shadow, I sometimes get the question of why there is the association of our inner child in the work. By itself, shadow can feel incredibly daunting and scary. Add a big dollop of our past and the traumas we went through – it can make it unbearable.

     If you’re feeling this way, trust me, my friend, you are not alone. But here’s why it’s so important to honor the inner child within you: because we cannot embrace the future without learning from our past. Who you were before and the experiences you went through made you the person you are today – it made all of the good, bad, and beautiful parts.

    BYPASSING YOUR SHADOW IS A NO-NO

    It took me a minute to understand what bypassing even meant when I first heard the term used in spiritual and well-being contexts. But if you break down the word itself, without the associations, it means to go around something, or take a route that allows you to skip a certain hustle and bustle.

    Now, I’m going to guess that if you’re reading this, you’re going to be more open to not bypassing your shadow and hold a willingness to start taking action in your truth. Fabulous! After all, it would be so freaking hard to digest this information, let alone just read it, unless you were.

    And that’s why I know that you know that you are made up of both shadow and light. Engaging in your authentic self – your sense of I – with acceptance, love, and compassion means holding reverence for not just the light, but the dark of what makes you you.

    When you bypass your shadow, all you’re doing is making your future more problematic and painful. You’re sweeping the dirt underneath the rug and not addressing what requires your attention. Trust me, I know – I did this for most of my life.

    Bypassing makes it so you step away from your power, your truth, and your passions in life. It can make your life unattainable, and can even oppress those around you, because you’re removing the authenticity and the opportunity for a full sense of sympatico. That doesn’t mean you need to address your shadows every time they arise. But it does mean that you give them proper attention and take action to work through them rather than around them. Otherwise, you’re asking for a haunting.

    YOUR SHADOW TRIGGERS

    Before we dive in here, I think it’s important to share that this is a B. Marie-ism. So take this term with a grain of salt. But during the last seven or so minutes of the episode, I go into and explain what the heck they are.

    Simply, they are a pent-up shadow energy, that functions like a reflex, whenever a certain form of shadow occurs. It can be trauma, but usually it’s something a bit more gentle – like dealing with a form of uncertainty, an action, chore, or type of work you don’t like performing, or engaging in some kind of comparison culture.

    Perhaps you get a little OCD, you experience perfectionism, or you just start crying inconsolably when you have to do something. Shadow triggers can be anything for anything. But you’re going to see a pattern of behavior for something that’s a general specificity.

    When shadow triggers arise, it’s best to just ride it out, hold compassion, and know it’s simply a way you’re dealing with the shadow in front of you. There’s nothing wrong, irrational, or bad in how you’ve responded. It’s perfectly natural and we all have them. Just do your best to hug yourself and show yourself some love.

    JOURNAL PROMPTS

    • What your doubts?
    • What do your doubts tell you?
    • Where do you hold skepticism and where can you take action in it?
    • What will you regret not doing?
    • How can you break the glass ceiling of your surroundings?
    • Where can you pursue resilience?
    • How can you look at your behavior as a form of communication?
    • What does your shadow say about you?
    • What are your shadow triggers?

      REFERENCES & NEXT STEPS

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